Archive for May, 2010


Today, I Celebrate

May 17, 2010

A year and a half ago, I didn’t know that women chose not to breastfeed. I thought if a women and child did not have a breastfeeding relationship it was because it wasn’t possible for one or the other. At the time, I chose to breastfeed as long as my baby and I were both willing and able to do so. Little did I know how much time I would spend snuggling Penny up to me – for sustenance, for ‘us’ time, for love.

I have never regretted breastfeeding, although at times I missed having my breasts belong to ME. At first, I spent so much time nursing Penny that I thought I did little else. Over time the frequency diminished until I went back to work in December. After a couple of weeks of struggling to nurse her every morning and every night, I cut out our evening session. We’ve both been happy to meet in my bed every morning before we start our day, and lie tummy to tummy while she suckled away. Her hands never stopped, always playing with the blankets, my bra, a toy, her toes, the dog or her daddy if he was home. But she knew what she wanted and her mouth never let go until she was done.

But that part of our relationship has come to a close. Over the last few days Penny has only nursed for a few seconds before rolling over and energetically starting her day. Today, she wouldn’t suck at all. So now, while I mourn the loss of that intimacy with her, I celebrate instead because my little girl is growing. I know that we will continue to find time for Mummy and Penny to snuggle, and I steal probably a thousand kisses from her in a day. I now get that half hour of morning back when we need it, and by golly my boobs belong to ME again! Well, and to Court too ;)